Simon Says

I’m not even going to mention how long it’s been since I posted something here.

Before people played Angry Birds and chased imaginary Pokemon, there was Simon Says.

Here’s two commercials back to back for this obnoxious computerized toy, although I am focusing on the first one from 1980.

Go Johnny, go!

Johnny is like the coolest kid in school because he totally slays at Simon Says.

Step aside, Pinball Wizard, there’s a new guy in town.

But as for me?

I sucked at this game. Bip, boop, bop. Red, green, green, yellow, blue.


Get bent, you giant microchip.


The slogan was “Simon’s a computer, Simon has a brain, you either do what Simon says or else go down the drain.”

I hated Simon. He wasn’t a nice computer, not at all. There was no way that I could keep up with him. He was just way too smart for me, what with all of his blinking colors and shit.

I swear one time while I was playing with him, he told me to go walk the yellow line.

Did you have a Simon Says? Were you able to beat him?


About Merbear74

Writing for me is a sort of self therapy and something that I have loved to do since I was young. I write about many things such as fibromylagia, chronic pain and depression. Sometimes, I also make an attempt at being funny.
This entry was posted in advertising, funny, humor, nostalgia, retro, toys and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Simon Says

  1. Ladybuggz says:

    Never had one, but had the game “Trouble” where you press on the bubble with the dice inside and it would make a lot of noise…I think it got stomped on and thrown out by an adult that thought it bothersome! Ass Hat! I thought it was fun!!

  2. I never had Simon, and had better things to ask Santa for as a kid. I did have a Merlin, which had a Simon-like game programmed in it…

  3. draliman says:

    Wow, those adverts make playing “Simon” sound like an intense life-changing experience. I’m trading in my PS4 for one of these awesome computer brains!

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